sunday

soup

sitting 

 sleeping

 sunset strolling

and, unfortunately, sadness at the news of a friend's loss. 

new directions

i really miss blogging.

i realize that this is a blog, and i write here from time to time, but so far it has all had a very specific focus. yes, this is a 'fat' blog, but being fat is not the only (or the most important, central) part of my identity or my life. it's one of those things that impacts a lot of areas of my life, but it doesn't define it.

i used to (and still do, actually) have a personal blog where i just wrote and posted photos, almost daily. that other blog has been on lockdown for a couple of years after some unfortunate bullying and harassment. i miss what the blog used to be and i want to have that again. i know that some day i am going to look back on this period as a really good time in my life. my life is pretty full right now and i want to take more time to document all aspects of this life, not just the ones related to body image and size acceptance.

so, my intent from here on out will be to use this blog in a more general sense. i will still write posts on particular and focused topics, but i will also write general updates, more for my own memory than anything else. i'm not sure that anyone even reads this blog, so maybe i'm just writing this post for myself, as a reminder to actually use this space (and that's okay, i don't need an audience).

i'm not OVERweight

i am fat.
i am large.
i am chubby.
I AM NOT OVERweight.

now, i'm sure that some fat folks identify with this term, and that is totally fine. but i hate it.

what does overweight mean? what weight am i over? this term implies that there is some ideal weight and that being over (or under) it is hazardous. yes, being extremely over or under the 'average' weight CAN be dangerous, but these things are not linked in an essential way. to me, the term overweight implies that until one's weight is no longer "over" something (the ideal), there is a problem, a risk to one's health.

i just spent four days at a conference called "community-campus partnerships for health" and although this conference was fabulous and inclusive, because it was related to health, there was a lot of talk of "the obesity epidemic". in fact, in one session when the presenter asked folks to shout out 'the -isms', there was confusion when i said 'sizeism' (although not nearly as much confusion as when i said 'cissexism', but that's a conversation for another day). being in such an atmosphere had me feeling rather ranty a lot of the time, but it was the use of this term - overweight - that really got me.

i'm not sure if the term overweight is hated by other fatties, but it really rubs me the wrong way.